Marriage Counselling is often criticized because of the number of therapists who claim they are skilled in working with couples but do not possess the skills to do so.
For matters of the heart, people want the very best, and a well-trained Marriage Counsellor who can help them through difficult seasons of marriage is no exception.
When choosing the right therapist to help you in your relationship, there are many important things to take into consideration. The first is that a Marriage Counsellor must be certified in the most effective and research-based Marriage Counselling, modalities.
Select the experienced and certified Marriage Counsellor
Finding someone you trust, who is able to confide in you, and who can provide a safe space for you to communicate with your partner, is crucial in helping you navigate the vulnerability you bring into therapy.
While romantic relationships can make us feel amazing, they also have the potential to bring us great pain. It is a sign of distress in your marriage that you need to quickly identify and fix the problem. This is where a professional Marriage Counsellor who is skilled and dedicated can help you to come out from the pain.
Top relationship rules for couples.
Don’t compare:-It is easy to believe that romantic photos on Instagram and Facebook are a daily occurrence. We often forget this is not a reality. Do not fall for the trap of social media, which can make you want more of what you cannot have all the time. There is no perfect relationship. Even if you are with “the one,” relationships can be difficult. Resentment and the inability to see the big picture can seep into relationships. Remember that even seamless relationships can be difficult. Instead of playing the comparisons game, express gratitude and appreciation to your spouse. Negativity and gratitude can’t live in the same place. Keep a gratitude journal.
Do not be judgmental with your partner:-These are the most damaging relationship behavior. They feel disapproval when you criticize their partner. This puts them on defense. They hear the message that they are flawed and need to be fixed or that their partner doesn’t like them. No spouse wants to feel inferior or unworthy. Constant criticism and judgment can make this clear. Avoid making blanket statements such as “you always” and “you never”, or feeling the need to laugh at your partner’s new idea. Instead, use “I” statements to express your needs (“I feel like I’ve been neglected by you when you don’t come home as promised”) or show support (“I love this idea!” You can do it.
Understand each other:-We approach to conflict with guns blazing. This tactic can make us feel more hopeless and at odds than ever, especially if we are retaliated against by our partners. Advice must be understood first. empathy is the best way to listen. Even if you disagree with their views, it is important to see where they are coming from. You can’t find common ground without understanding your spouse’s point of view. Listening is the best way to listen. Don’t add more ammunition to your disagreements. Instead of listening to what they feel, you can counterattack.
Don’t always be in command:-You may feel more comfortable handling all the labor if you dislike the way your husband folds the clothes or think he isn’t being as careful with the cash. But halt! According to Dr. Wish, “the spouse who does the rescue can feel bored of that position” and unhappy that she has to carry the entire load, even though she consented to do so. Make it a practice to ask your partner what they believe will work best in this situation or to say, “I could use a hand cleaning out the pantry,” to your partner. These demands will strengthen the impression that you are teammates.
Communication is key to successful marriage life:-Two people must choose to love one another even when they are not feeling the same way. This is what makes a strong marriage. It is impossible to give up or stop trying. Keep trying, no matter how difficult it may seem. It is a good idea to take breaks when things get too hot. Try again after twenty minutes. Speaking side-by-side instead of facing each other makes intense moments less intense. Walking, holding hands, and discussing the issue is a too good idea.
Avoid using the D-word (divorce, that is):- Never threaten to leave or go to the lawyer’s office, even in the heat of an argument. In addition to being incredibly cruel, using the “D” word repeatedly may lead to one partner calling the other’s bluff.
Getting the help of an expert for a better life:-It might not be easy to break the cycle of negativity, no matter how hard you try. It is not a wise strategy to wait for it to pass. Research shows that couples spend an average of six years waiting before seeking Marriage Counselling. It is not a sign of weakness to make the decision to seek out couples counseling. Sometimes we can get too caught up in our emotions and feelings that it becomes difficult to see the bigger picture. Problem-solving is not possible. A skilled Marriage Counsellor will help you to identify the root cause, offer support, and work toward healing.
When working with couples, therapists can use a variety of valuable and unique skills. These are some of the most common problems that couples face, as well as suggestions for how to fix them in your own marriage.